Why does this hair make me feel dirty

Hi everyone. I’m new here but not new to the prolem of excess hair. I have it on my face (cheeks, chin, upperlip, forehead)and the rest of my body. It’s not thick, but it is black and noticeable. Pubic hair for me is thick and coarse–and so bothersome. I hate it- it actually makes me sick to my stomach looking at it. Shaving is a pain- I can never get close after the 1st shave and irritation bumps follow with scars. I absolutely hate the excess har and thick pubic hair. I am under the impression that this would make men gag as well (I am female), and my boyfriend hates pubic hair too.

After I shave, I feel clean, whereas before, I just feel dirty and disgusting. I’ve noticed some people have very fine pubic hair and little to no body hair.

It’s needless to say I dont feel comfortable being close to my boyfriend or letting him see my face . And if I dont shave, I jsut feel so dirty and nauseous. I just feel bad.

I’m considering getting laser hair removal or electrolysis, but I have darker skin rather than pale, about the color of Sanaa Lathan (or a little lighter than Beyonce if you’re not sure who she is) skin and I’m worried about scarring. Depilatories make my face break out and dont work for pubic hair.

I am so at a loss and so disgusted by my problem. I don’t feel like a soft, smooth woman.

All I can say is that I can so relate to how you’re feeling. It’s funny how it seems all of us have the same thoughts, feelings etc.

I too feel dirty when all hairy. It’s really ashame what hair on females can do to our self-esteem. I used to be very bubbly, the life of the party, not perfect by far, but very confident and dudes ate me up because of the way I was. Now, I look at my life at mid 20s, think of all my young days I missed out on, still missing out on. All the dreams I had, that I never let come true due to this… ugh, only if others knew what some of us go through.

I’m really sick with this. Don’t know why I now started back shaving my face being so many ‘professionals’ say it’s best for s, and doesn’t make the hair grow more. Told my mother today, she shuck her head, and pretty much begged me not to do it again saying it’s gon’ grow like a man. Because even though they tell us it doesn’t make the problem worse, I didn’t have this problem until I shaved my face like an idiot when younger… so just as many cases the so-called professionals end up being incorrect, I can’t wait til this story hits the fan, and the media admits that they were wrong on their studies!

So you’re also an African American female. Well, through for now, just thought I’d respond being no one else did. Good luck!

It has been proven by studies that shaving does not make hair thicker, it is just an illusion while it is growing out.

Nikki is correct. When you started to shave, something else was happening at the same time, side by side, along with the action of shaving, your hormones were kicking in. Hormones, a good blood supply and a woman’s vulnerabilty to the male hormones circulating in the body determine hair growth in certain areas - NOT shaving. This has been proven over and over again in the 20th century.

How do we really know this to be true? I began growing hair well over 8yrs ago after shaving. The only places hair grew at were those places. Then now that I’ve started back about a month or more ago, now all of a sudden it’s spreading farther down, headed towards my neck area from accidently shaving spots that were hairless. (It’s very thin, but still I know if I keep this shaving up, it’s going to become thicker and darker, very noticable just as what happened to me the first time.)

I apologize being I know many say it’s proven, and that may be so, but I just can’t believe that matters how hard I try.

Think of how many times the ‘professionals’ tell us this is right, that is wrong, then a year or so later their saying they found out that they were wrong. Such as with Sunscreen. At one point they stressed how it prevented cancer. Then a few years ago they started saying the opposite, that it causes it. I haven’t been keeping up with that, just something I remember from watching the news a few years back. They always say something then later come back saying, “We’re sorry, we made a big mistake!” :smiley:

So I really understand where you all are coming from and respect what you all feel, but something inside just tells me that they’re just saying that either for a money deal, or something went wrong with the researching. Again, I respect how you all feel!

It may become more noticable because instead of the hair tapering to an almost invisible point like it does if it grows out, when you shave you cut it across where it is thicker. Other things are happening.

I will let the pros refer you to the studies done.

I would be interested to find your sources about sunscreen causing cancer.

there have been several studies and it has been proven (run a search here for “shaving study” or something like that). here’s the reason for the illusion:

  • most people start shaving when they first see hair appear, which is in their teens when hormones are starting to take effect and body STARTS developing hair

  • most people don’t realize that this process takes years, usually from 14 yrs old to 26 or so at least. so they think anything they develop after they turn 16 or 18 is caused by shaving, when it’s actually caused by your body and hormones

  • when you shave, you’re cutting the hair half way between the tip and the root where it’s thicker than the tip. so the stubble makes you think like the hair is darker or thicker. If you wax the hair instead, you will see this easily as the hair that grows out is thinner at the tip again since it wasn’t cut mid-way, but pulled out with the root.

  • how old are you? if you’re developing more hair in certain areas and you’re way past puberty, you may have PCOS or other homronal imbalance. an endocrinologist or a good gyno should be able to test yo uto figure it out.

  • I also don’t know where you found that sunscreen causes cancer. There are no studies like that. Plus, with shaving, it’s a simple experiment. It physically doesn’t make sense and cannot be explained how cutting the hair off without touching it’s root can do anything to the root to make it grow thicker or produce new hair. And there is research that has been done that determined how to kill hair. In order to do that, they needed to figure out how the hair grows. And since electrolysis permanently destroys hair, you should be pretty confident that they figured out exactly how the hair grows, and confirmed that shaving doesn’t do anything to the hair structure.

For the original poster, even with darker skin, you can treat your bikini with laser and get good results. You would need a Yag laser only and someone who knows what they’re doing.

For your face, you need electrolysis for permanent removal.

Being stuck in this house, all I do is read, read, and read. Watch a bit of news every once in a while. With that said, I can’t believe no one has heard of this. Every time you watch the news, they’re saying researchers are finding out that something they said previous was good for you, now they’re saying it does you harm.

I know some things are best left unsaid, due to debating. One person will stick to their belief, and so will the other, it will always be a disagreement. Therefore, I just go with my gut feeling.

I won’t mention my beliefs on the shaving thingy anymore, because what I feel is truth, well, we’ll never agree to it. But as far as the sunscreen skin cancer thingy, just Google “sunscreen cause Cancer” and you’ll find lots of info. LOL it goes back to our original beliefs, even once you all see this, 9 times out of 10 you will say the info. is incorrect.

I just used that as an example, I’ve seen researchers go back on their word with everything… it’s ALWAYS about the money which is sad for us who are seeking help in certain areas!

Besides Googling it, here’s a few links on it:

link 1 sunscreen cause Cancer

Here’s another example of research gone bad. Even millionaires such as Oprah have a fitness trainer telling them and others that Canola oil is good for you, but then you see more research that says the opposite:

Canola oil good for you… oops, bad for you!

BTW, I’m not saying I know for a fact that sunscreen causes Cancer, my only point was that researchers, the so-called ‘professionals’/‘experts’ aren’t perfect in their studies, and tell us one thing one minute, and something totally different the next. Again, no hard feelings! :grin:

I just want to tell you that I truly understand how you feel. I have been shaving my pubic hair since I was about twelve or thirteen, because I did not feel clean with it. My pubic hair is unbelievably hard and thick. It is more black than my hair on my head. It was too much for me when I was that young. Maybe my hormone was out of whack. I don’t know. I did not start my period until a couple years later. I was too embarrassed to get a help (I still am).

Anyways, I had let it grow out one time, but I still feel the same way and it was so uncomfortable while having sex. So did my finance. So, I have been shaving ever since. I have tried the cheap electrolysis, One Touch (I think?), and it was very unsuccessful. I have found myself having less bumps or reddish spots after shaving by shaving more frequently (daily for me and it takes only maybe ten seconds after a good practice). Now, I am trying to learn more about both the electrolysis and the laser.

As a female, you will have an easier time finding a practitioner to remove your pubic hair. Just do your consultations on your legs to see what their level of skill and what their treatment sensation is like.

If your hair is dark and coarse, you will be very happy with laser hair removal treatments. Do read my story and the FAQs below. your issue is very common and laser hair removal has done wonders for people like you. this area is cheap and gets the best results.

For the original poster,I can feel how they are think about hair.Because me too think like that.Do laser is better? maybe is yes but its expensive!

Welcome, kumikoying.

One of my most repeated statements here on hairtell is, “There is no easy way down for permanent hair removal. Permanent hair removal is not an easy gig, because it requires patience and know how. Permanenet hair removal, whether it be laser or electrolysis, takes about a year to a year and half to complete and it can be ouchy. Permanent hair removal costs money, but it is worth every penny in the end to be smooth and to be free from the ever present ritual of chasing hair with temporary measures.”

To add to this, you as the consumer have to study and then weigh which strategy to use for the area(s) you are concerned about. Hairtell is the best textbook available for this purpose, I believe. Are you a good candidate for laser and where do you find a skilled practitioner with an excellent laser?
Everybody is a good candidate for electrolysis, but again where does one go for skilled electrolysis care and is there even an electrologist in your locale? There aren’t many of us left on certain parts of the earth.

So to answer you question is laser better, for some people yes and for some people no. Same can be said for electrolysis, but the one up that electrolysis has over any other hair removal method is, it can “see” all colors of hair on all colors of skin. It is technically more dificult to do as well, so that surely has something to do with the fact that there are not electrolysis spa’s on every corner of every street,like laser.

Again, there is no easy way down for permanent hair removal, but there is a way down for those that plan and then stick to that plan with loving and calm patience.

Dee