My story (Italian, 35 yrs gay old man)

My story: I started getting very hairy legs, arms and some chest hair when I was 12-14. Due to loss of confidence I started avoiding the beach, leaving my sport team and overall feeling moody (read depressed) and like I was not going to be accepted by my friends unless I hid my hairiness. During the rest of my teenage years I started experimenting with bleaching my body hair and plucking. Early attempts on temporary remedies.
By the age of 20 i started getting bald and coarse hairs started covering the rest of my body. Back, shoulders, you name it. In desperation I went to a doctor and tried Spironolactone for a few months, and had laser on arms, hands, shoulders, back (It was year 99-2000). Even electrolisys on my hands a few times. Results of all these efforts were minimal, temporary, invisible. I then moved (read escaped) to Uk (where i still live to these days) and tried Sugaring (all over my body)a few times and got a little electrolisys home kit. After a few months I gave it all up. The last 10 years of my life (I’m now 35) a pair of tweezers have become my best friends. At least for my face(the awkward bits) as it’s the one part of my body which I cannot hide! Hairs on my body are so coarse and long that I usually want to scream (read cry). Last winter I experimented rubbing a pumice stone around my body (mistake) and when nervous I plucked some of back hair with my own hand… one big chunk at a time! I don’t think there is any hair-free area left now. In summer I “manscape” by body hair with a beard trimmer and tweez the “double/triple hairs in one follicle” from my arms, so that the arms/upper arms look vaguely less hairy. I still don’t expose my body very much in public. I actually think it’s getting worse by the year. My ears are recently joining in… with black coarse hairs coming out from the inside but also around the actual ear. I see clearly what’s happening for me in the next few years and I’m genuinely scared as I don’t think I’ll be able to deal with it any longer. My social life is poor because of this. Romantically speaking it’s not as bad as it could be but most of the time I blame my hairiness for not allowing me to relax and feel accepted whenever I meet a man I actually like. The last few days I’m trying to tell myself that maybe I should be thankful to mother nature for such ABUNDANCE of hair. I mean… wow…I’m blessed! No, not really. Even though I have sciatica problems I’m sort of healthy…so yes I shouldn’t complaint too much about my life. My insecurities helped me to develop an inward creative side…my only outlet to clam me down. I’m now considering to find a doctor and have a hormonal imbalance test… and be laughed at from the NHS (national health system) for wasting their time and taxpayers money. I’m just wondering if there is any other man in my situation here that has found a solution of some kind. (mild hormonal treatment?) Any suggestion is appreciated. I know I will never get rid of my body hair but I wish I could decrease their coarseness. Normal hair removal treatments are not really feasible as my body hair is far too much. Tempted to get a big supply of spearmint tea and liquorice but then I must be kidding myself again. Thanks for reading, wish me luck. Xn

Hi hairywolf,

I completly understand your insecurity, because I feel the exact same thing. I have a lot of hair in my body and I can not enjoy life. I have to hide my body, even in summer.
I would like to ask you a question : does spironolactone work ? I mean, generally it is medication for transexual women, or women losting hair. Did you have some side effects after using spironolactone ?

Actually laser is not permanent. But it is an option to remove hair if you don’t know a good electrologist. Maybe in your country you could find a good one.

Actually laser is not permanent.

If you have super dark, dense and coarse hair, laser will work really well provided the appropriate laser and proper settings are used. I’ve done both laser and electrolysis and have been very happy with the permanent results from both.

If it makes you feel better, I’ve felt self-conscious about every guy I’ve dated as well since I’ve been hairier than them, but honestly, every single one of them understood my displeasure with myself and in fact, were more proud of the fact that I had a problem and begun to take care of it. I’m sure most will feel the same way about you

Being male, you do not have a homone imbalance causing this. It is a normal feature of masculinity. It is a case of disliking hair very passionately, so you really need to make a plan to rid yourself of it. Perhaps by posting photographs here you could get some advice from others undergoing this process. How is your skin coping with all the tweezing? most people would by now ,have masses of ingrowing nairs and pigmentation problems