James is down for the count.

Start here! Share your feelings
#1

Long story short, I have been trying to do too much, for too many people and I have to reset before I drop dead of exhaustion.

It has been over two years since my last vacation, and my health has been in steady decline for some time. Why have I been so neglectful of myself? In addition to the usual dedication to my work and clients, my generosity has gotten the best of me, and the number of homeless friends and family that I have been caring for reached both a breaking point, and a critical moment of clarity.

Without too many details, one of my charges died this past week. There was nothing I could do, and all I had tried to do seems to have amounted to simply having bought this person a few more years. While that may have been invaluable, the idea was, and always has been to give a helping hand up, and watch the birdies fly again.

I have to face the fact that I have taken on too much, and that I can not save the world although 6 people (2 toddlers) still rely on me entirely for a roof over their heads. (also, people you are helping are often not the best at returning the favor, or helping you to help them) I am currently neglecting myself to the point where the person in the box seemed to be getting a really great opportunity for badly needed rest. Funny how waking up with 20% mobility in one thumb and 50% in the other with pinched nerves in the neck and back spasms didn’t get more than cancellation of a few days appointments, and right back to the grind.

Well, I will do my best to attend to my current commitments, but it is time I take time for that badly needed reset to reclaim the health that I know I can once again have, (and have helped others to have) before its too late.

I don’t know what all will be the result of the up coming changes, but the short term will mean that those who have come to expect quick replies to emails and phone calls may need to learn to wait a little while.

The board will get along just fine, as the day came long ago when Andrea and I no longer needed to reply to every question asked just so someone got a response. If I never posted on here again, the world would not stop spinning.

Now, I must make arrangements for what awaits… beach house, check, thousand plus page books I have not had time to read, check, Norwalk Juicer and Vitamix Blender, double check. Cleared calendar of work, playing out the string. Learn to live and let die… I’m working on it.

#2

hugs
take care of yourself first James.

This seems to be a bad time for everyone these days, myself included.Give yourself the time you need.

I’m happy to see to replies when I can get to them here.I’m not always up to it, but I do try.

Seana

#3

Hey James, I remember you from when I joined HairTell so many years ago. You have always been a source of information… and also jokes! I hope you find relaxation a refreshing change.

Enjoy reading, relaxing, and drinking juice!

#4

You have done so much to help others here, James! It’s time to put yourself first for a while.

We are all so grateful and hope you feel ready to return sometime soon! We’ll be here waiting till then.

With deepest gratitude,
Andrea

#5

Dear James,

Your comments and suggestions have been very helpful for me - as a victim of electrolysis overtreatment, but even more during my startup as a professional. Please let me thank You for this.

And yes, after these long years and a profession as demanding and exhausting as ours is. You really deserve well every time to recover You need.

Please let me wish You all the best for the future. And hopefully we’ll meet again.

#6

James we hope you will continue sharing your experience and knowledge on here after stuff settle down in your life. Countless consumers, do-it yourselfers and starting out pros learned a lot from you and we won’t forget that.

#7

Thank you for always being available to help others: myself and any other colleague who would listen, students and consumers…
All the best.

#8

As long as I have known you James, you have always had your fatherly wing over no less than 10 kids and their mothers. That’s a real act of kindness that most people would never commit to.

I appreciate all the instruction and support you have given me over the years and it has been fun sharing Hairtell with you. Rest up your back and hands and come on back as soon as possible!

#9

Thank you for your kind words.

When your blood pressure gets to 200 over 100, you really need to make some changes. The problem is having so many people whose life depends on the safety net you hold tight can get to be crushing.

I found out recently that the reason so many Trans people have ended up taking extended stays at my office guest apartment is because they are actually denied service in the homeless shelter system due to the gender segregation rules of homeless shelters. Since their gender status is considered to be “ambiguous” they are denied a bed based on them neither being considered male or female by the social service persons providing the shelter placements.

I want to address the situation further, and yet, I do need to take some time out from keeping others from falling into the pit.

#10

You are very right about that james. That is what happens.It also happens here, the shelters are not set up also to properly house trans folks or segregate them so when they are place, sexual assault is often the result. when in “emergency shelter” last year I spent 4 months living in a motel downtown, with pimps propositioning me in the parking lot coming and going with my kids to hook for them. They wouldnt have placed me in a shelter because of my trans status.And the sad part also is transpeople are 10 times more likely to need a shelter system. Statistics here last year ere that 70% of homeless n my city are GLBT and that the majority of THOSE are trans. It’s …just what society does to us.

Seana