I'm ashamed of hair on my back, 24 male. HELP

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#1

I am fairly young, 24 Male, and have hair all over my back and shoulders. I know it’s hereditary, but it’s just so difficult to live like this. I NEVER go to the beach without a shirt on. I am embarrased to have “relations” because I don’t want them to see the hair on my back. It’s really disturbing that I cannot enjoy things that most people in their twenties can enjoy.

I’m undergoing laser hair removal in the area, but that has its own bag of problems (damaged skin, doesnt work well enough, etc etc).

Anyway, please share if you also have this type of problem, plus how are you dealing with it??

#2

You’re at about the age I really became bothered by my own similar problem. That damn hair-it seems to be everywhere!
I am now 34yr old, still bothered by my hair problem, but have learned to cope. Somehow, with all this unsightly hair I managed to find a beautiful wife and a successful career. You will do the same.
What I did in my twenties was trim the hair so it wasn’t as noticeable. It seem to help with my self confidence and was not as emotionally taxing as waxing etc. You’re still young and hormones will be a problem for you and hair removal. If laser doesn’t work, or you want more permanent removal you can always try electrolysis.
My opinion is you may have to accept temporary solutions like shaving, waxing, trimming for now. Currently, I too am trying laser with so so results.
Other people don’t care as much about it as you do. You have the power within you to stop caring what other people think. LOTS of hairy guys out there-you’re not alone-it feels lonely sometimes but hang in there-it does get better.

#3

Thanks for your reply, i appreciate it.
it’s still very bothersome, but i guess there is hope!

does waxing the back really have such bad side effects like people say it does?

#4

Speaking from experience (my own and others I know!)

Waxing really does have some bad side effects such as:
Increased growth
Ingrown hairs

As waxing is merely tweezing on a massive scale, the hairs are pulled out, tearing the papilla of the hair apart and doing sub-dural damage to the tissues. To properly heal, the body produces a lot of little capillaries (very small blood vessels) to bring more nutrients into the area to speed healing. Unfortunately, along with the increase in blood supply comes an increase in androgen, which triggers hairs to become more dense as well as thicker and deeper.

Also, asa a new hair will be generated from a damaged/deformed papilla, a lot of times the new hair will not make it to the surface, but grow sideways or around the follicle in a tight spiral. These are known as “in-grown” hairs and oftem become infected, but at the least cause bumps and a lot of other unsightly, often uncomfortable local conditions.

Shave or use dipilitories if you must, but avoid tweezing or waxing!

Hope this helps,
Joanie <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

#5

Look, I dont understand about this waxing problem. U say it makes more hair grow back and others say it makes the hair fine or even not comeback. I think it is definitly a genetic thing and allow people to try for themselves. I have waxed areas and the hair has grown back finer. Althought i think i have grown more hair, I am just of the belief that I am still young 23 and hair is growing. So, maybe it might work for some. for adam, just hang in here for a couple years I think scientist realize how big a problem this is for people and they want to help… because they can make a lot of money

#6

It is pretty embarrassing with the chicks and going to get waxed but I found a pretty cool new shaver - mangroomer.com. It was only 40 bucks and lets me shave my back hair off whenever I need it. I was psyched because it doesn’t cause ingrown hairs like a regular shaver my girlfriend use to do to me or with my electric foil shaver. This mangroomer is the best thing I have found. What’s really cool is that it is totally private because you can do it yourself, no one will ever know. Hope this helps!

#7

Should you opt for shaving, try the trimmers with length attachments. Use the 3/4" head and see how that looks and feels, if that looks too long for you, you can always use a shorter attachment to get in closer. Hairs falling on top of eachother gives the appearance of having more hair than you actually have so trimming can minimize the appearance of being so hairy.

Should you opt for waxing, find someone who has several wax choices suitable for different skin types and make sure to exfoliate once your post wax irritation is gone - buy an exfoliating back band with an exfoliating cleanser. Should you be prone to ingrowns, this will minimize it. It you wax every 6 weeks, you will think that the hairs are disappearing. This is actually true for most people who wax their legs and arms but since your back is the issue, those hairs will return so keep up with your waxing regimen.

And of course, there is laser. Sigh. Its expensive and disappointing for so many. If you continue laser, don’t have high expectations.

And then, there is electrolysis; slow but steady and if you keep up with your treatments, have the area cleared as quickly as possible, it will be the solution to your unwanted hair issue.

Or, you can do a little experimment.
Feel the shame and go to the beach anyway.
Feel the fear and take your shirt off anyway.
Know that your body is going to be more protected from the elements than your hairless counterparts.
And know this, there are women who are highly attracted to anything that represents testosterone - and you might find a partner who really really likes your hairiness.

#8

Hi Adam 4671

My advise is shaving for now. Other options are pricy and more time consuming than shaving. Try electric shaving. It also might seem pricy but it has many advantages - wet and dry and also no blades! Best try one with clipper options at first.

Regards
Stuart

#9

Hello Adam4567,

My suggestion would be same as Stuart’s.

Just try to help you feel better about yourself… I would suggest you to go to beach with shirt on, and pay attentions to other guys’ back for one afternoon. Are there any guys in the beach with hair on their back and shoulders? Or are they all smooth? (A number of hairy guys do shave before go to beach.)

#10

Hey,

Remember, when you go to the beach, everyone is too worried about how they look themselves to ever notice how everyone else looks. Women are more concerned about if they look fat, or if anyone can see the razor bumps on their thighs, etc and other men may be thinking about whether they look fit or have too much or too less body hair as well. And if you happen to be a hairy guy, make up for it by working out or dressing nice, and having great personality. The most attractive and sexiest thing on a person is confidence. I have met many guys who weren’t that great looking but were very attractive and desirable because of their confidence.

#11

Well I did go to the beach like you guys said and everyone looked good. The few that did have back hair had so little that it was not noticable - not at all like those who need laser treatment. I did see one person with a lot of hair and a very hot girl with him. But I also saw them getting into a $90,000 car at the end…go figure.

Anyway, thanks for your resonses. I’m just using a mix of laser treatment and shaving…hopefully that will make it look better.

#12

Most hairy guys don’t have the balls to go to the beach-good for you! Who wants a woman who’s with you for the money anyway?! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

#13

Most hairy guys don’t have the balls to go to the beach-good for you! Who wants a woman who’s with you for the money anyway?! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Sorry, im still too chicken. I had a shirt on…